Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Back From Hiatus

I apologize that I've been MIA so much lately. Unfortunately I had come down with a viral infection that was quite ugly. But I'm feeling a lot better now, so it's back to blogging!
Having been so ill, I learned even more about the military family. Before being stationed here, I had heard time and time again about how the military is like your family away from family. I thought there was no way that could be possible...but it is. Sure, when I was feeling under the weather, having my mom taking care of me would have been ideal. But a lot of people came forward offering to drive me to doctor's appointments, bring me anything I may need, etc. I had people constantly checking up on me and seeing how I was doing. It was great knowing that there were so many people down here that had my best interest in mind too. I think it's safe to say it made me a little more okay with this lifestyle. My network down here is great. Sure, everyone will eventually go to different places and no longer all be at the same base, but that's part of this life.
Sometimes I think people forget what exactly they signed up for. I've seen several military friends end up divorcing or really depressed because this life is too hard for them. I'm not saying this is easy, no way, but what I am saying is that you really have to know what you're getting into before you get here. I did my research and talked to wives on Facebook, forums, etc. so I came in with a pretty good idea of what this life entails. I will never divorce my husband because the military life is too much. And I've learned to make the most of it so that being depressed won't happen either. In fact, I kind of actually like it here and will be sad when we move on to the next base.
Yes, there are low moments. For instance, F has to go TDY for a week that happens to be the week my best friend is getting married. I'm the Matron of Honor and I was really looking forward to having F with me. Going dateless is pretty lame, especially when you're married. I would be lying if I said I wasn't really upset. But, I know that that's part of this life. He's missed birthdays, Easter, etc. and I'm sure he will miss many more things. When "the big D" rolls around, that's 6 months he'll miss. No, this life isn't glamorous but, it's my life and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Letter to a Military Spouse

While I have never had the pleasure of meeting you or your husband, I felt the need to write you and express a very deep feeling that I have in my heart.
I, as a person, am not brave. I do not tackle things head on..., as I hate confrontation. I will travel 100 miles out of my way just to avoid a conflict. I am an American woman that has no idea what is going on in the military other than what I hear on the news.
I have never had to let go of someone so that they could go fight for people that they didn't know, people that sometimes do not appreciate or understand what they are fighting for.
I have never had a sleepless night of worry because of a report that another bomb has exploded and I still haven't heard from my husband.
I have never had to wait for months on end to hold the one that I loved so.
I have never had to tell my children that daddy wasn't coming home tonight because he was so far away fighting for something that they aren't yet old enough to understand.
I have never had to hold my head high and suppress the tears as I hear that it will be at least another six months of separation before my loved one gets to come home.
I have never had to deal with a holiday away from the one that I thought I would share every day of my life with.
And I have never had to feel the panic rising in my heart at the sound of a ringing phone or knock at the door for fear that it is the news that everyone is terrified of getting.
For the reasons listed above, I can not tell you that I understand how you feel. I can not tell you that you must be strong. I can not say that you shouldn't be angry, because you "knew what you were getting into when you married a military man". I can not say these things because I have never had to walk in your shoes.
What I can say for certain is that because of your unselfish acts of bravery and your husbands willingness to stand up for those who see him as "just another soldier" - - I will never have to walk in your shoes.
I do understand that as a military wife you are expected to uphold a certain amount of control, but I never understood how you could do it, until now. I have figured out that you are not like other women. You are of a special breed. You have a strength within you that holds life together in the darkest of hours, a strength of which I will never possess. The faith you have is what makes you stand out in a crowd; it makes you glow with emotion and swell with pride at the mention of The United States of America.
You are a special lady, a wonderful partner and a glorious American.
I have more respect for your husband than I could ever tell you, but until recently I never thought much about those that the soldier leaves at home during deployment.
Until this moment I could never put into words exactly what America meant to me.
Until this moment, I had no real reason to.... Until I heard of you.
Your husband and his military family hold this nation close, safe from those who wish to hurt us...but you and those like you are the backbone of the American family. You keep the wheels in motion and the hearts alive while most would just break completely down. Military families make this nation what it is today.
You give us all hope and you emit a warming light at the end of a long dark tunnel.
Because of you and your family...I am able to be me. I am able to have my family. I am able to walk free in this great land. Because of you and your family, I can look ahead to the future with the knowledge that life is going to be okay. Because of you and your family, I can awake to a new day, everyday..
I realize that you are a stronger person than I will ever be because of these things and I just wanted to take the time today to say thank you to you and your family for allowing me that freedom.
I will never be able to repay this debt to you, as it is unmatchable. However, I hope that you know that no matter where you are...what you are doing...what has happened today...or what will happen tomorrow...Your husband will NEVER be "just another soldier" to me.... And you, dear sweet lady, will never be forgotten.
You are all in my prayer's everyday and I pray that God will bring you back together with your loved one safely.

May God Bless You!

(Author Unknown)

Wednesday, August 10, 2011